I don't normally do this... if I have something to say to my wife I sit down with her and talk with her. I am posting this publicly so that maybe if there are young men reading this they may learn something and those that are old and your marriage is long in the tooth that you read this and breathe some life somewhere. And NO there is nothing wrong in our marriage and I am not apologizing for something that is about to break our family.
I just want/need my wife to know how deeply in love with her I am.
To my wife:
first I want to say that I am truly sorry.
I am sorry that I have not become a millionaire so that I can give you all the things I think you want.
I am sorry that I have not always been the husband you needed me to be.
I am sorry that I have not always been the father to our children that you needed me to be.
I am sorry that I have not always followed Jesus the way he commands me to that you can follow.
I am sorry I have not always made it clear that I do love you more than you think I do.
you are my best friend and my partner.
I know that we could not be more opposite if we tried. I can think of only 1 or 2 things that we have in common and they are .
My desire is always to:
- Remember that my words can shower down pain and destruction but they can also bring joy and life.
- Continue to court you, to chase after you and express my desire to be with you, physically and mentally/emotionally.
- I will never say "I would die for you". How hard is life after you have died?.... "I will LIVE my life for you." I will give away any of my desires for you because you are my deepest desire. (The Lord not withstanding).
- Put your needs and desires before mine; to not be selfish but to offer to you first, then I will take the left overs (as you have always done for me).
- To learn your love language and remember to speak to you in that language, to make sure I am loving you the way you need to be loved and not the way I THINK you need to be loved or that I need to be loved.
- To remember when we have an argument, that we ARE NOT enemies and I do not need to win "whatever means necessary". I will try to calm myself and discuss until we come to an agreement for the needs of our family.
- Whenever I have been hurt or feel I have been wronged or degraded I should remember that you love me and it is not your desire to emasculate me but to lift me up and love me, I will reach out and explain why I feel hurt and listen to your side of what I misunderstood.
- I want you to know that I do see you are an equal and not one to be lorded over or to be worshipped, that you are my partner and we are both trying to do our best for our family and for our King.
- I will not ask you to go fishing with me (and you will not ask me to read a book) because I know you want to be with me out there but aren't able to be and I know this hurts you.
- I will not ask you questions that I know are to set you up so that I can prove how I am more right than you are and make you feel small.
- I always want to lift you up in the hopes that one day you will look in the mirror and see what all the rest of us see, how amazing you really are.
- You are NOT the reason for every bad thing that happens in our family or friends lives. Most of the time you are the encouragement we all lean on when things go south.
- You still make my heart skip when you smile at me or compliment me, you make me feel like a super hero.
- Your love and compassion are the very blood in my veins that give me the strength to keep fighting when the big boss music starts (video game reference). I fear NOTHING when you are by my side.
Keep this truth in your heart always; I love you beyond my understanding!!
Thank you everyone for reading.
Until next time:
Cast a big net and keep tight lines.
